Unified Quest 2011

Ever since the crash of 2008 the defense intelligence establishment has really been paying a lot of attention to global markets and how they can serve as a threat to U.S. national security interests. At one upcoming seminar next month they’re taking a look at a lot of the issues.

source: see the CNBC video report provided

According to the report, the Army has spent time on financial market trading floors with JP Morgan and others, in the hopes that they can learn more about how a financial and economic attack may occur, and what the ramifications of such attacks on US stocks and bonds may be.

The Army, in a year-long war games series called Unified Quest 2011, is looking at a variety of possibilities and how to deal with them, including:

* the implications of “large scale economic breakdown” inside of the United States
* how to maintain “domestic order amid civil unrest”
* and ways to deal with fragmented global power and drastically lower budgets

Wait, we're on the road to recovery - everything is fine - we're all good now. Right? Right? Why do I have the feeling the US government is a combination of Kevin Bacon and Chief Wiggum waving their arms in front of the fireworks display assuring us "There's nothing to see here" ?

Dear Blasphemes readers... time to learn how to grow your own food.

I assure you we're open

Some folks need practical advice.

Subliminal Messages

Babies R Us, sometimes I think you WANT to fail!

Blasphemes's Bluffer's Guide to the Super Bowl

Blasphemes's Bluffer's Guide to the Super Bowl

It seems that there are quite a few un-interested parties in this year's Super Bowl. There are some people who just watch for the commercials. There are some people who are just damn morons and are either pretending to care, or are just outright posers. Anyhow, I have decided to try to help the morons out by giving them a cheat sheet for the event. Whatever you do, don't complain about the host's choice of beer - and for the love of Science - don't let them see this crib sheet!

PRE GAME:

1. "Dwight Freeney is the key. If he can't play, or plays but can't push off the edge, the Colts are going to have to get better interior pressure on Brees." Then laugh, because the Colts are going to completely dominate this game.

2. "I heard CBS was going to run a pro-abortion commercial, too. They were going to introduce us to the cast of 'Jersey Shore.' But it tested so well that it encouraged genocide."

3. "If Reggie Bush is goin' to the House, he's going to have to be much more elusive in the Red Zone." [Do not respond when someone says "Who is that?"]

4. "You do realize that the Saints defense is rated 25th in the NFL. Shhhheeeiiitttt."

DURING THE FIRST HALF:

5. "We might be witnessing the greatest aerial assault since the Germans entered Holland."

6. "Look on the bright side, it's only 11 days til pitchers and catchers report."

7. "Hey, did you see Lost? Yeah, me too."

HALFTIME:

8. "The Who? I guess Elton John and Billy Joel were too busy?"

9. "Remember when MTV would run Beavis and Butthead during the half time? Yeah. That was cool. Huh huh."

SECOND HALF:

10. "Peyton Manning is just f*ckin' with them now."

11. "Maybe Caldwell should rest his starters for the offseason?"

12. "Only 11 days 'til pitchers and catchers report!"

Snow storm

Neal Before Iorio

U.S. President Barack Obama bows to Tampa Mayor Pam Iorio at MacDill Air Force Base on Thursday, Jan. 28, 2010 in Tampa, Fla.

Okay, we can all have a reasonable debate on what's showing respect to other cultures and other world leaders - or the Pope... but the mayor of Tampa?

Guns Save Lives

A Chevron gas station manager reported shot a violent armed robber in self defense.

Around 9:20 PM, a robber entered the Chevron gas station in Cocoa, Florida. He pointed a handgun at the manager while demanding money. The manager reportedly grabbed his own gun from below the counter and fired in self defense. He hit the criminal and caused him to flee to the parking lot. He collapsed. Police arrived and found their 'suspect' laying the parking lot. He had gunshot wounds to the abdomen. The suspect was then airlifted to a hospital for emergency surgery, where he was listed in critical but stable condition. The would-be-predator survived to fight another day, and the cost to taxpayers to pay his medical expenses for being shot, his prosecution expenses, his defense expenses, his incarceration expenses and emotional trauma, no doubt. If the attendant had spent a little more time in the firing range, maybe all these expenses could have been avoided?

Neither the gas station manager nor any other innocent people were harmed. Speaking about this self defense shooting, Police Spokesperson Officer Barbara Matthews reported stated, "He absolutely had the right to defend himself.

Unarmed individuals can suffer a terrible fate when a criminal robs them, even if they fully cooperate with the criminal’s demands. The same is true for those who try to run from the robber.

On the other hand, fighting back can be quite effective in reducing the risk of injury to the victim. Here's a story of an armed barber who shot an armed criminal who threatened him and his son, saving both their lives. Here's another story of armed pet shop clerk shot an armed robber who threatened a fellow employee’s life, as well as his own life, preventing them both from being stabbed. I've got another story of an armed pizza delivery man defended himself against 3 armed robbers, and walked away unharmed! This armed citizen stopped a bank robber, while this armed Israeli citizen stopped a terrorist. This motel clerk was also able to stop an armed robber and ensure that neither her, a fellow employee, or a nearby mother and baby were harmed. Even outside the context of armed robbery, self defense has been shown to be the best course of action.

An armed society is a safe society,

Not Sitting Well

Okay, "Free Breakfast" at the hotel. Good deal, that ought to be worth about $20.00 off the tab by way of subtraction by way of repeated borrows or some kind of fancy conversion method. Right? Way too early to be thinking too hard.

Okay we've got a waffle maker over there - hmmmm... lot of work to get that going. Syrup looks a bit off. Hard boiled eggs? Not on a dare. Oatmeal and sugary muffins. Don't see a toaster anywhere... Hellllloooo what's this?

A Jimmy Dean Bacon Egg and Cheese Biscuit? Well, I love McDonald's Bacon Egg and Cheese biscuit! How much difference can there be, really? Wow, the packaging makes it look so big! This is going to be... oh, crap why did I look at the ingredients!? I don't want to know how many calories - ahgh! 21% Saturated fat?! Jebus Chrimmiss! Wait, maybe that means there's a LOT of bacon in there? I mean, it's Jimmy Dean. They're going to hoggify this little waffer of a biscuit so that you go out and buy more of their meat, right? Hell, they probably gave these away for free to the hotel so that you'll be so excited with how awesome and delicious with a pile of bacon on it, you'll be a customer for life for all Jimmy Dean breakfast products. How could a nice guy named Jimmy Dean mean no less than to help a feller out?

Okay, where's the instructions? Bake for 20 minutes -- nope.

Microwave.

Reservations.

Microwave bacon, egg and cheese -- and a biscuit. How 'good' or 'wholesome' can this thing I'm holding possibly be? There's a road trip that needs to be considered, along with the count of how many rest stops I'm potentially going to have to inspect on that route now. Okay, there were about 5 on the way down, one at Interstate 70 -

I think I can pull this off, even in a worse case scenario. The worst case is that Jimmy Dean is going to try to kill me.

Okay, here we go. Only one minute? That doesn't seem like a lot of time for a yummy breakfas-
*DING*
Done already! Peel off the package... Oh. My. Goo -

How come the cheese has smeared everywhere but on the sammich?

Well, it doesn't look like much, or like any food product that I've put in my mouth since caring about things like saturated fat and high fructose corn syrup... but, but, it's my old pal Jimmy Dean! There's bacon in there - somewhere. Right?

First bite. Shudder. Wha- what was that? That was a biscuit? There oughta be a law against calling that a biscuit. Okay I'm giving up on the counterfeit biscuit. There's still bacon to be had. I think.

Ugh. This is - why am I - oh, there's the bacon! And it's limp. But, uh - wow. I ate that. I can't believe I ate as much of that as I did... I really ought to throw the rest of that away - but I hate to waste it...

And it's over. Need to wash that down with hotel coffee. Oh, and orange juice! Maybe the vitamin C will counteract the terrible terrible price I've paid by eating this monstrosity described as comestible.

You know? I better have a second glass of that orange drink.

My co-worker lazily comes in. I see him eyeing the remaining Jimmy Dean thing in the cooler. I ought to wave him off. No point in us both fighting for the same defiled toilet seat while on the trip home.

"Oh yeah, I had one of those last time. Not pretty."

What?! I just ate one! What happened?!

"Oh, you'll see."

No, I don't want to see - should I seek medical attention now? Will I make it home, or am I a dead man walking?

*phew* that's just not sitting well.

You know, for all that fat and salt you'd think it would have been at least tasty. Jimmy Dean, you're dead to me. Now, excuse me while I find a men's room.

Welcome to Chicago - the Next Detroit

First the Cubs fall apart in April. Then Jay Cutler and the Bears fail to show up to their expectations, then Chicago loses the Olympics, and now all of its trade shows.

As for the last on that list, it's too easy and lazy to accuse union price gouging at exhibit halls as the only reason... ah that's been goin' on for decades. However, those shows heading for the exits has become a stampede.

The International Plastics Showcase, which has been exhibiting in Chicago since the 1970s, and the Healthcare Information and Management Systems Society waved a giant single finger McCormick Place. And now the National Restaurant Show, a Chicago convention fixture for more than 50 years, is thinking about 86'ing the town as well.

When the food people come to town, they eat out - they spend a lot, and tip a lot. Bye bye.

From the Chicago Tribune:

Derrek Hull, a spokesman for the restaurant show, said, "I'm not aware of any discussion about moving the show as of right now."

"However, what I can tell you," said Hull, "is that we've been through this before ... and the association and all our exhibitors continue to be very vocal. They continue to be concerned about the costs of doing business in Chicago and at McCormick Place."

The association seriously contemplated a move in 2006, but chose to stay after the city wrested labor work-rule changes from unions that work at McCormick Place.

That was chump change. Meanwhile, a task force designed to turn things around for struggling Chicago's convention industry met today. The group is made of staff from several politicians, trade show leaders, hospitality executives, and unions. I love task forces and blue ribbon panels. They're the nice tablecloth that politicians drape over the broken, bloodstained wobbly tables.

Chicago is a loser. It's not just her sports - although Chicago sports are the gangrene of the a dying limb.

Chicago is expensive. Not having a show in Chicago might save you 20 million dollars... which is a number I heard floated around. 20 Million in savings by having a show in Orlando. And in Orlando, you can take the kids to DisneyWorld! But that's not all. How about the nickle-n-dimes that add up in every purchase? How about that damned 10.25% sales tax on all those nice folks coming to the windy city?

10.25% - still. And even after the Mighty Quinn changed the rules for the Cook County veto over the President "Toddler" Todd Stroger... they still can't roll it back, and that's less than 70 days before the Cook County Board Election - as if we won't notice.

Look, even if the Cook County rolled back the tax - it's too late. The damage is done and the collateral damage is everyone who depends on tourists coming into this stupid town to pay our bills, debts, truck scandals, lawsuits against the police, and overpriced parking meters.

Welcome to Chicago - the Next Detroit! Be sure to pull all the copper out of the walls before you leave.

UPDATE: And the toilet keeps flushing - Oprah might be leaving Chicago as well. I know for sure that she's ending her talk show.

The media mogul Oprah Winfrey will end her daytime talk show, "The Oprah Winfrey Show," in 2011 as she prepares to start a cable channel of her own. Read More on Oprah. Okay, I'm only guessing that she'll leave -- but I can't

If only it were this easy...

Now, some of you might read into this. To you it might say, meh, I agree with about half of that. Or, tried that. Didn't work. Now I'm a slacker *sshole.

Some of you may see, "Conform & Obey." But you need special sunglasses to read that.

WWF Video? WTF?

This isn't over, the World Wildlife Fund, it seems is not just an innocent victim of a bad rogue ad agency in this whole 9/11 ad fiasco.

When the ad broke big, WWF in the US put out a hasty condemnation; then they said it was a spec ad from a Brazilian agency and that WWF "did not authorize its production or publication." Great, but not exactly. Ad Age reports:

After the WWF appeared to initially deny approving the ad, DDB Brasil and the WWF hammered out a statement posted in Portuguese on both groups' Brazilian websites Wednesday afternoon apologizing for the ad and attributing it to "the inexperience of some professionals on both sides, and not bad faith or disrespect toward American suffering."

Fine. Over. Right? I'd move on except that now the agency and the WWF both say they have no idea who did the video version of this ad = Oh really?

You know the worst part? This is a terrible spot. Nature is more dangerous than religious fanatics - so protect it? How does that even make sense? If anything, this ad makes me want to pave the whole bloody planet.

I Know Better Than You, And I Don’t Care What You Think

Said the Congressman to his constituents.


Transcript:

MASSA: I’m not going to vote for 3200 as it’s currently written. Step one, I will vote for a single payer option or a bill that does have a medicare coupled public option, which we don’t have right now. If my town hall meetings turn into the same media frenzies and ridiculousness, because every time that happens we lose, We lose another three million people in America. They see that happening and negate us.

PARTICIPANT: It changes America.

MASSA: Every time that occurs. So what happens in my town hall meetings frankly is important, because I am in one of the most right wing Republican districts in the country, and I’m not asking you guys to go back to wherever and send people to me. This is a generic statement of what can I do? Well that’s one thing we can do.

PARTICIPANT: So if we got your meetings to sixty forty, you’d vote…and there was single payer in a bill you would vote for it?

MASSA: Oh absolutely I would vote for single payer.

PARTICIPANT: If there was sixty forty sentiment in the room?

MASSA: Listen, I tell every audience I’m in favor of single payer.

PARTICIPANT: If there was eighty twenty in the room?

MASSA: If there was a single payer bill?

PARTICIPANT: And there was a single payer….

MASSA: I will vote for the single payer bill.

PARTICIPANT: Even if it meant you were being voted out of office?

MASSA: I will vote adamantly against the interests of my district if I actually think what I am doing is going to be helpful.

(inaudible participants’ comments regarding the “interests” of the district statement from Mr. Massa)

Massa: I will vote against their opinion if I actually believe it will help them.

If that isn't elitist arrogance from Democratic Congressman Eric Massa, then I don't know what is. He admits that he's stacking the room for his meetings, and that he will vote against his constituent's wishes because he knows what's better for them than they do. [source]

LIBERTY ONCE LOST IS LOST FOREVER

"Cities may be rebuilt, and a People reduced to Poverty, may acquire fresh Property: But a Constitution of Government once changed from Freedom, can never be restored. Liberty once lost is lost forever. When the People once surrender their share in the Legislature, and their Right of defending the Limitations upon the Government, and of resisting every Encroachment upon them, they can never regain it..."

John Adams to Abigail Adams - July 7, 1775

Health Care

Okay, you want to talk about Health Care. Hey, you clowns in the back with the Swastikas, quiet down a minute - holster that weapon! Let's all look at what it is going to take to bring some real solutions to the Health Care problem.

First, let's all agree what we're doing now is not only unsustainable, it doesn't make a lot of sense. We're all going to agree that there is a NEED for a change in to the mishmash of policies and practices we're doing now. We also need to agree that we are already paying for the folks who aren't participating, which is why the prices are so high. Okay, can we get that groundwork down?

Okay, now let's tackle how the government and private insurers can come together. We can all do this together.

Blasphemes mentioned earlier this week that tort reform should be the first plan to cut costs in health care. I will repeat it. Tort reform or caps on bad outcomes would keep malpractice premiums and lawyers fees fixed. We also need the loser to pay the court costs. If tort reform isn't part of the package - I don't care who's paying for it, all the money still goes to the lawyers and the insurance companies. In tort reform, we also have to tell people you can't sue because your Doctor didn't run eighteen million and one tests on you to cover his ass, legally. If your Doctor offers the best care, and if it doesn't work out, sorry, he gave it his best shot. YOU CAN’T SUE! That’s the rule, just like the rest of the world. Yes, a system for legit redress of grievances must stay in place if he amputates the wrong foot. But with tort reform there's a price tag on that foot depending on your age. If you are 25, that sucker's going to be, oh, 5 million. If you're 69, here’s twenty bucks and a free prosthetic.

With all that testing that Doctors do to cover their ass from getting sued - let's also stop firing up the six thousand dollar MRI to look at a hairline bone fracture. We can do that with a three hundred dollar X-Ray. The old Radiation King can easily diagnose your problem. But the MRI costs money, looks cool and we need to charge you for it. Today if you already spent that $500 deductible - who cares, right? You’re not paying for it. Guess what, somebody is paying for it. And that somebody is everyone else. So lets all knock that off, okay?

Since we're talking about technology - why don't we trim all that administrative crap out too? How? Well, the medical field is notoriously full of luddites especially in automation and record keeping. Hardly anything is electronic. Have you looked behind the window at your Doctor's office? It's all paper files. But that's to protect your privacy. Uh, yeah, great - but if you have to visit another Doctor, say in an Emergency - that piece of paper has to be sorted, shipped, looked at - and oops you're dead because no one knew you were on ABC medication with XYZ condition.

Also, a database for efficacy in treatments, outcomes and drug testing plus interactions might inject a little extra science into the whole 'practice' of medicine. Perhaps an attempt to make paying quicker and more efficient would help too. Now I see three ‘this is not a bill’ notices from the hospital, and a year after treatment I’m being served by a credit collection agency and then trying to figure out who didn’t pay and why – a whole year later. That system not only is strange and inefficient, it’s also silly. No one wins.

So we modernize the records and bill paying. Now think of what we can do with all that data. We’ll be keeping track of which Doctors are doing a good job, and we can put them on some sort of list? We could create a Best Doctor list –a Zagat-ish Guide to help patients make better choices based on what ‘good’ or ‘exceptional’ care actually is? Maybe those Doctors could teach other Doctors what they’re doing right – and the best practices so that everyone will have better outcomes?

What about primary care and promoting health, rather than just treating a chronic ailment? You know? Actual Health Care? Doctors can keep a person alive for years with modern medicine. Heart disease, kidney failure, diabetes and a slew of other chronic 'conditions' used to kill you. Now we can pump you full of meds and tubes to keep you alive for - hell - forever. You can live with a condition that doesn't kill – but that’s expensive and who wants to live that way?

Maybe we all need to agree to PREVENT those 'conditions' from occurring in the first place? That's part of the 'Social' in Socialized Medicine. I don't hear many folks on either side of this debate talking about this aspect of the deal either. It's up to ALL of us to eat right, exercise, take care of your self and get off the booze, smoke and loose sex. If you want the 'European' way, this is the social contract you must agree upon to participate. It's on YOU, and on ME, and your Neighbor to not get fat, sick and... well… American.

Changing everyone's attitude about taking responsibility for his or her personal wellbeing? That's nothing short of a Herculean task. But it must be done. Because, I'll tell you, WorldofWarcraft182, I'm not going to be too happy about paying for your fourth bypass surgery.

Which leads me to another issue - everyone must participate. Everyone must buy insurance. Everyone in the pool. You know the claim of 49 million uninsured you keep reading about? It is a little misleading. About 12 million of them are illegal aliens. You're already paying for their healthcare even if you don't have insurance. That's why a wad of gauze costs you over $50.00 in the E.D. Actually, that’s why gauze costs private insurers fifty bucks. Anyhow, that’s 12 minus 49 so that leaves 37 million uninsured.

Who are they? I’ll assume the self employed, twenty year-olds, the Unibomber, the homeless and shut-ins. What if one of these shut-ins, WorldofWarcraft182, decides he doesn’t need insurance? He has a heart attack – THEN he magically decides he needs that product? I can’t drive my car around and call up GIECO to get insurance after I crash into a school bus… but WorldofWarcraft182 and millions more do this with health insurance all the time. They simply ‘opt out’ until it’s convenient. Meanwhile, everyone else is on the hook for this dope that never contributed a dime into the collective pool. Convenient for him - not so much the rest of us. This is why Hillary Clinton and McCain’s plans were to mandate everyone must buy health insurance. It is necessary to offset costs. It’s more fair – (however, the costs will still go up – look at the last three years in Massachusetts) – and some still fall through the cracks – but we can’t keep letting WoW182 keep jumping in and out of the pool and taking a bucket of water out when he feels it suits him.

Also the argument that buying health insurance is so unacceptable really needs to re-evaluate their debate cards. States mandate insurance for your cars, and no one pickets. Your mortgage provider also requires you to buy home insurance for their house. That’s right – the mortgage company (the good ones anyway) require you to buy insurance for the house they own while you slowly pay rent-to-own. Moving on.

We also need the government to quit paying only 30% of the bill. Somebody has to pick up the tab after the government orders the bottle of wine and lobster and only leaves $30 at the table - then runs out the door to make a phone call, leaving everyone else with the $70.00 difference. Oh, you only had a glass of water? Too bad. That's how it is now. Public programs typically underpay everyone. Doctors and hospitals hate Medicare. Ask ‘em. To top it off, they have so much paperwork just to get the 30%, many would rather not participate… if they had a choice. So who really pays for that other 70%? You do, your employer, private insurers and the folks who have to pay out of pocket. But Nancy Pelosi needs a villain – and she picked private insurance. Considering they’re picking up your tab for Medicaid, Mrs. Speaker, perhaps you should pick on the folks who don’t want to participate instead? Oh, you called them Nazis? Great work there.

That’s why health insurance and service cost what they do now, plus add in inflation – and that’s why it keeps going up.

Take my suggestions: Tort reform, everyone has to play – and everyone has to be good and the prices should go down and service should also improve. With the savings, we can subsidize the folks who slip through the current system with a sensible government plan. Simple stuff, really. We just have to roll up our sleeves and do it… before the government steps in and makes it all worse than what we’re doing now.

Road Rage

Dear Cap'n:

I have a bad case of road rage.

It is pretty bad, I probably need help. I get very angered by people driving in front of me. I curse/yell when I drive alone and rant to people who drive with me. I pretty much think that most people on the roads today do not deserve to drive and are clinically retarded. I have actively tried to stop driving as much and I fear that this will be bad for my stress levels / heart in the future.

kgrad5

I have a similar problem - and I have figured out why - and it has helped me....

I realize that some moron who is not paying attention, following the rules, yacking on the phone, applying nail polish, reading a book, all at once - all have more power than I do. That's right. They can take everything I have away from me. Allow me to explain. At any given moment, when they swerve or ram into me they will have - in the best case scenario make me late. Worst case, end my day on a permanent basis. That's not such a good thing. I get upset thinking that this ding dong in curlers can kill me.

I guess what gets me so upset is the carelessness at 45-90 miles an hour. I know how quickly FUBAR happens, and these other idiots who DON'T understand that principle. I've seen death and brains on the concrete. It's not fun. I'd rather not see it again. Especially my loved ones or my own before the lights go out.

Knowing that those other drivers are the idiots, and to be defensive helps. I assume that Murphy (who was a safety engineer) was right - if it's going to go wrong, it will. If you keep yourself busy anticipating bad moves, that you won't have time to be angry. You'll come up with some good ones. You'll be happy when it doesn't go the way you thought, and you'll laugh that you were right. Example: There's no way that lady is going to light that cigarette while on the phone at this speed! Holy spit! She did it. Ah, but she only swerved two lanes instead three... well, there's always this guy passing me on the right. Maybe he'll hit her...

Hope that helped

[Hey, when did I become an advice guy?]

Too Much WoW, What Should I Do?

Dear Cap'n,

My boyfriend is playing at least 40 hours a week of World of Warcraft. What should I do?

I met my current boyfriend in World of Warcraft. We had only known each other for a month, and we started having very strong feelings for each other almost immediately. After a week of talking, I got him plane tickets to see me. He only makes $800 a month at his current non-profit job, whereas I was working full time.

The first meeting in person was a bit awkward, and things were not as great. But we continued to communicate honestly, and I gave it another chance because of our strong feelings. I flew out to see him in his home state, and it was really nice.

So we had this sort of long-distance thing. He was going to graduate school this fall and could not move, so I would have to be the one to move. It was a difficult and monetarily unsound decision in this economy... nonetheless, I quit my job at the end of last month and moved across the country to live with him.

Looking back now, that was probably a mistake. I am still looking for a full-time job, even though I do web design and development and can do a little bit of freelancing from home. I have no friends here, and it's a very different place than the more liberal and easily walkable city I used to live in. We just play World of Warcraft all the time, and we hardly even communicate anymore.

When I brought up these issues to him, he said he would cut back, but he has not really done so. He currently has two maximum level characters decked out in all epics, and now he started to level a third character intending to gear that one, too. I play WoW with him in between doing my freelance work, but I feel like it is getting in the way of something else -- but what?

One time after a verbal fight with me, he deactivated his account and was pouty, and hinted at basically that I was taking away his favorite toy. We are both nerdy people, but I feel like I have more interests than just WoW. He gets a big ego boost out of leading raids and his in-game friendships, whereas I feel like the game is just a game. I do really care about him, even though he seems really addicted, so I don't want to just cut my losses and leave.

I am at a loss as to what to do.

Oh and if anyone's looking for a freelance web designer with XHTML/CSS/WordPress/Drupal/Joomla experience, please PM me. :)

Okay, first off, love getting fan mail. Thanks for the letter.

Second. You moved to be with this douche? You kind of deserve what you paid for. Nothing.

Third, could have done without the spam/advert for your services. I can't imagine, even if we WERE hiring here at Blasphemes I'd hire someone who's a big enough idiot to a) write me for advice b) doesn't understand that she shouldn't have moved, and started 'dating' anyone who only makes 800 bucks a month.... it sure is a non-profit - none for him!

I suggest that you leave at once. Discover who you are. Then, if you're still an idiot, find a UFO religion or drugs to occupy all that goddamn free time you have.

Iranian Photoshop

Iranian state media photoshops pro-Ahmadinejad rally to make it look like there's more people.

They really need to upgrade to CS4 or something, maybe take a class at the Learning Annex?

The Facts

Mexican Flu / Swine Flu: Top 21 Answers You Need to Know

With more outbreaks of the new strain of swine flu come outbreaks of misinformation and rumor.

Twitter is proving to be notorious for spreading false information.

The following are 21 questions answered by infectious disease expert Charles Ericsson, M.D., professor of internal medicine and director of Travel Medicine at The University of Texas Medical School at Houston.

Also, Robert Emery, DrPH, vice president for Safety, Health, Environment & Risk Management at UT Health Science Center and associate professor in the UT School of Public Health explains common sense preparedness and prevention of illness.

1. How do symptoms of swine flu differ from other types of flu?

None, really, although this flu might include gastrointestinal symptoms (diarrhea and vomiting), as well as the usual respiratory symptoms. The basic symptoms for swine flu are similar to the seasonal flu we are vaccinated for each year, which may include:

• Fever (greater than 100°F or 37.8°C)
• Sore throat
• Cough
• Stuffy nose
• Chills
• Headache and body aches
• Fatigue

2. If I felt flu-like, how would I know if I had swine flu?

You wouldn't really, nor would your physician know for sure without a respiratory specimen taken within the first 4-5 days. The specimen would then be sent to the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

The cases so far in the US have been relatively mild compared to the illness described in patients in Mexico. We do not yet know why the US cases have been milder.

The important point is to call your doctor if you think you have the flu. Prescription anti-viral drugs such as TamiFlu or Relenza can be called in by your doctor. Unless you are:

• exceptionally ill with flu-like symptoms
• are chronically ill
• immune-suppressed
• quite elderly
• or have a very young child, under age 2

It is best not to report to the hospital, clinic or doctor's office, where you could risk spreading the disease. Again, call your doctor first to get instructions as to what you need to do next.

3. How long are people contagious?

Adults are potentially contagious for the length of time one has symptoms, up to 7 days following the beginning of illness. The “shedding stage” of the virus is during the first 4-5 days of illness. Children can be considered contagious longer, up to 10 days. The initial incubation period is 24-48 hours.

4. Is there medication for this?

Yes, Tamiflu or Relenza have shown to be effective against these recently reported strains of swine flu. Altogether, there are four anti-viral drugs that we commonly use to treat various strains of flu.

5. Can I start taking medicine for it now, just in case I get it later?

That is not presently advised. Preventative medication might be advised for very special circumstances where a person had to expose themselves to potentially ill people during an epidemic (which we do not yet have here). Such people might include ER workers. An outbreak in a nursing home, for instance, might lead to protecting all the other residents with a drug like TamiFlu.

For the general public, the current answer is no to prophylactic (preventative) use with anti-viral medications. Its coverage time is limited.

Do not confuse over-the-counter “cold and flu” preparations for anti-flu medications that require a prescription.

6. Are the symptoms in children different from adult symptoms?

Though the basic symptoms are similar, the signs of potentially life-threatening complications differ.

The CDC advises those with these symptoms to seek emergency care immediately:

Emergency warning signs in children are:

• Fast breathing or trouble breathing
• Bluish skin color
• Not drinking enough fluids
• Not waking up or interacting
• Being very irritable
• Fever with a rash

Emergency warning signs in adults are:

• Difficulty breathing or shortness of breath
• Pain or pressure in the chest or abdomen
• Sudden dizziness
• Confusion
• Severe or persistent vomiting

7. Is there a vaccine?

Not yet, but the CDC has this current strain of virus and will consider whether to add it to next year’s flu vaccine as time goes on.

8. If I took the swine flu vaccine in the swine flu scare during the 70s, would that cover me? What about this year's flu shot I just took?

We don’t know yet. Previous vaccines could be expected to afford only partial, incomplete protection at best.

This new strain of the swine flu virus (H1N1) actually has a mixture of swine and avian components (not to be confused with the deadly avian flu of Southeast Asia).

9. Can I catch it from pigs?

No. This strain is one that is communicable through human-to-human contact. It is a mutated form of a swine virus.

10. Can I catch it from eating pork?

Absolutely not! Swine flu is not transmitted by food. It is not a so-called foodborne illness. Bacon, ham and other pork products are safe to eat, assuming they are prepared properly. An internal temperature of 160 degrees for cooked meat will kill any bacteria or virus.

Swine flu is transmitted by airborne droplets from an infected person’s sneeze or cough; or from germs on hands, or germ-laden surfaces. Eating pork will not give you swine flu any more than eating chicken will give you bird flu.

11. How does it cross from a pig to a human?

The swine virus mutates so that it can infect humans and be spread by humans.

12. Can it kill me?

Deaths have been reported from the Mexico City outbreak. So far the cases in the US have been mild and there have been no deaths as of this writing (Monday, April 27) We do not know all the factors geographically and demographically that may contribute to the mildness or severity of this flu.

But, like seasonal flu, there is the potential for serious outcomes.

13. Why the big concern if the regular flu kills 35,000 people a year, which is why we are all encouraged to get a flu shot?

This is a new flu strain that our bodies have not been exposed to before. The flu strains that the CDC creates a vaccine for each year all have the potential to cause great harm, especially in elderly, pediatric and chronically ill patients. This particular flu strain has struck seemingly healthy, young adults, with some resulting in death in Mexico. It also appears to be quite contagious. We will know more about this strain in the coming days.

14. How is it different from avian (bird) flu?

Avian flu so far has had difficulty infecting humans unless they are exposed intensely to birds, because the virus has not mutated in a way that makes it transmissible by humans to other humans. This virus has origins genetically from both pigs and birds, and the big difference from the avian flu is that this swine virus can be transmitted readily from human to human.

15. Is this just another scare that will go away like bird flu?

Bird flu is a theoretical threat and will need a mutation to be able to be transmitted among humans to become a serious threat. The present "swine/avian" virus clearly has already caused a major outbreak in Mexico City and San Luis Potosi, Mexico and has spread to places in the US (California, New York, Texas, Kansas and Ohio). What is not clear yet is whether this virus will result in a so-called pandemic—worldwide spread with major outbreaks--or whether it will fizzle out. But, even if it fizzles out, there is logical concern that it might re-emerge next flu season.

16. Should I cancel my vacation to Mexico?

At this writing, the situation is very fluid, changeable. I suggest checking frequently with the CDC Web site for possible Travel Alerts. I probably would not travel to Mexico City for a vacation that could easily be rescheduled, if for no other reason than the city has tried to limit access to crowded or public places where transmission might be facilitated. That does not sound like a very pleasant vacation to me!

Having said that, there are more than 4,000 flights to Mexico from the US and none have been cancelled as of this writing. However, some international airports in Europe and Asia are stepping up precautions and issuing alerts. Again, check the CDC’s Travel Alerts page.

17. What if I'm on a plane? Should I wear a mask?

Not necessary. The air on a plane is filtered. Transmission might occur if someone sitting close to you coughs or sneezes on you. The newer designs of aircraft airflow keep the air in a top-down flow, not forced air from front to back. However, if you do have a respiratory illness, it might be best not to travel.

18. How long does the germ live on surfaces, like on my desk if someone sneezes in my office?

Influenza virus survives only minutes on inanimate objects or hands, so these are very inefficient ways to spread the illness. Influenza is most easily spread by droplets that come into contact with our mucus membranes such as when someone coughs or sneezes in our faces. If we shake hands with an infected person who has just wiped their nose and then we rather quickly rub our nose or eyes with our own hand, then we could get the flu. So, good hand washing does play a role in diminishing the spread of the disease.

19. Other than hand washing and covering my mouth if I sneeze or cough, what can I do to take care of myself and others?

If you are ill, stay home. Control your sneezes and coughs. If you cough into your hand, remember the virus could be live on your hand at least for a few minutes, so wash your hands before touching anyone else. If you get symptoms suggesting the flu, call your doctor, who can call in a prescription for medication to treat the flu. Resist going to the doctor’s office or a hospital ER for influenza symptoms unless you are seriously ill. You do not want to spread the disease to others.

20. What else can I do?

Keep in touch with the most recent CDC messages through the following links:

http://www.cdc.gov/swineflu/investigation.htm
http://www.cdc.gov/swineflu/general_info.htm
http://www.cdc.gov/swineflu/whatsnew.htm

Go to the sources of verifiable information such as WHO (World Health Organization) or the CDC.

Most important, be alert, not panicked.

“There is a huge difference between preparedness and paranoia”, says Dr. Robert Emery, occupational health expert at the UT School of Public Health at Houston. “Although we’re dealing with a new strain of flu, a set of universally applicable preventive measures exist that can be employed right away by everyone to help stop the spread of this disease”

21. Zombies?

Really too soon to tell.

White Devil's Mistakes

Brazil’s President Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva on Thursday blamed the global economic crisis on “white people with blue eyes” and said it was wrong that black and indigenous people should pay for white people’s mistakes. (Financial Times Link)

Well, he's only half right. It's white, blue-eyed Congress:

(From NYTimes Nov 5, 1999)
''Today Congress voted to update the rules that have governed financial services since the Great Depression and replace them with a system for the 21st century,'' Treasury Secretary Lawrence H. Summers said. ''This historic legislation will better enable American companies to compete in the new economy.''

The decision to repeal the Glass-Steagall Act of 1933 provoked dire warnings from a handful of dissenters that the deregulation of Wall Street would someday wreak havoc on the nation's financial system. The original idea behind Glass-Steagall was that separation between bankers and brokers would reduce the potential conflicts of interest that were thought to have contributed to the speculative stock frenzy before the Depression.

I thought we were better than this. Really. When will the endless racism against the powerless light skinned and uncolored eyed people of this planet EVER end?

Remember, racism is always an acceptable way for a head of state to express his views, as long as it's directed against whitey.

Allow a quick, second rebuttal...

Meet Vikram Pandit:

Citigroup's CEO Vikram Pandit has cemented his reputation as the worst CEO of the new breed of men who replaced the remarkably careless and callous executives who ran Citi, Merrill Lynch , AIG, and other financial colossi during the first part of the decade.

Pandit's tenure has been marked by tens of billion of dollars in losses and bumbling in his attempts to decide which business units the bank should keep and which should go. He said at one point that he would cut Citi's expense base by 20%. There is not much evidence to show that Pandit is even close to that goal.

Pandit was also the engineer of Citi's failed bid to buy Wachovia, more evidence of his very modest competence. Full Story here...

See, Luiz? It's not a matter of skin color - it's a matter of greed and incompetence! And greed and incompetence crosses gender, race, and creed!

Anatomy of a Hangover

I wish someone had shown this to me a long time ago. The multi-vitamin and a huge glass of water before passing out would have saved me countless hours of recovery. The sports drink isn't a bad idea either, however, there's also a lot of crap in there too.

Give this to someone in college and you will have done not only a good deed for the day, but also performed a "taught him how to fish" level of duty.