Oct 30, 2014

Maddon Men

Former Tampa Bay Rays Manager Joe Maddon will likely become the new manager of the Cubs, according to reports from CBSSports.com

The Cubs and Maddon are on the verge of making a deal that would pay him at least $5 million a year, according to CBS.

Other outlets have confirmed the story, although the Cubs say the report is inaccurate, and MLB sources will not confirm it until after Wednesday night's Game 7 of the World Series so as not to overshadow it.

Oct 9, 2014

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta

Vice President Joe Biden, right, gets ready to pay for an ice cream cone after a campaign rally for U.S. Sen. Jeff Merkley in Portland, Ore., Wednesday, Oct. 8, 2014.  (AP Photo/Don Ryan)

Oct 3, 2014

50 Ways to Lose Your Lunch

"This has gotta be the only country in the world
  that could ever have come up with Bulimia."
                                                                  --George Carlin

"I have always liked this story:
 A man... with one hand to a one-way sign, is vomiting
 into the gutter; another man goes past... and [says],
 'If you only knew how much I agree with you.'"
                                                                   --Jean Fremon

slice of life by killre

Barf, vomit, puke, blow chunks, bounce your breakfast, boot.
Heave, hurl, hoist the colors, hoist the ensign, hoist the mains'il.
Eject, reject, project, renounce, paint the floor, bark at the Earth.
Yell at your shoes, laugh in Technicolor, pray to the porcelain god.

Post to your blog.

Salute the dignitaries, liquidate your holdings, launch the shuttle.
Toss your cookies, pogo with just your stomach, denounce your dinner.
Ralph, regurgitate, reboot, raise the flag, raise the steaks,
raise a mushroom cloud, create a casserole, Ralph Kramden.

Promote a piece of legislation.

Expel, upchuck, throw up, throw it into reverse.
Do penance, make like Mount Saint Helens, sneeze with soul.
Say something with substance, elevate the disgustion,
air your grievances, review the contents, tie-dye the carpet.

Don't digest; divest!

Ironically, "spill your guts" ...not on the list.  Means somethin' diff'ert.

Full disclosure: I read a list like this many, many years ago, albeit not in stanza form.  I admit to outright stealing two expressions, which I found particularly memorable, from that list.  The rest are either quite common or came directly from my brain.  No reference materials were consulted.  I do not claim the list to be comprehensive.  Feel free to add to it.

There are 49, not counting the title.  Here is the 50th:

Express your opinion of Bud Selig.