Why DirecTV Sucks

I decided that I'd go with the wall electricity mounted thing for my DirecTV On-Demand thing.

I discussed with my IT department. Okay, my buddy who's an IT professional. He looked at the website while I was on the phone, and we BOTH thought it'd be good enough for the applications we were talking about.

I even posed the question to you - my dear readers of Blasphemes (although, no one commented on it)

So I got the wall mounted "Kit" to create a "Network" shipped to the place where I'm going to use the thing.

I have ONE device. This is neither a "Kit" nor a "Network" by the simple definition of the words.

Pissed, I called our good friends at DirecTV - first I spoke to the computer that asked me what's wrong? I shouted into the receiver to explain my concerns...
The computer asked, "You're too angry for my voice recognition software to understand. Here's a help menu of simpleton topics that I DO understand, such as 'NASCAR.'
I was forced to calmly try to explain 'Service'. Twice. I was still too angry the first time.

Billing picks up. (but I don't know that yet)

I explain my situation, I explain that their picture of two units as part of the "kit" online would suggest that the "network" would have been sent in one nice package. Their web site is garbage, unclear, and on the verge of 'bait and switch.' Even my IT guy didn't see that there needed to be TWO purchases.

The fellow on the phone informs me that he's with billing - and will happily send me over to "Technical."

"How is some one reading a script on the Technical side of the room going to solve my problem of you people b*llsh*tting me into thinking that I was getting the whole "network" with one purchase?"

"I don't know, but let me send you over to Technical. Hold please."

This was actually a much longer conversation - however, I'm condensing it for the sake of humor and time.

Technical - "[Exhale, cough. Possible Bong hit?] Name and info.
Give it to him for a third time.
"What's seems to be the problem... ?"
I get into it. You're not going to help me. You don't understand. I'm pissed that I'm spending ANOTHER 35 bucks (70 total now, for a 'free' On-Demand Service) I'm out time, I'm out ANOTHER 35 bucks, I'm waiting another 5 days to get the OTHER part that I THOUGHT I was getting in the first place.

He tries to order it too. He disagrees. He sees the same picture I do. I argue semantics of the English language that a "Network" would constitute a closed and complete system. Not one part.

Someone else calls on the other line. I know I'm not getting a discount, an apology or even less than a finger from Dopey McDope on the 'Technical' side of the telephone.

Maybe I thought I WAS entitled to something Free... what was my point? Why should I have wasted my time? Shouldn't I have just sent it back? What's my purpose in life? What is God and the Afterlife... Muddafuggas shouldn't have put that picture on the fuggin' website!

Am I retarded? Can I not read? Feel free to leave your comments.

NOTE: The picture has CHANGED since my tirade this afternoon. The "First" Networked will require 2 WAS NOT on there when I first ordered the product. Yea me.