Mar 25, 2008

Naming Rights

I was just thinking about the names of things, and the Wrigley Field naming, among others.

And it occurred to me, we change or rename things all the time. It's the major bonus of using English as a language. We can re-name, change the meaning of, absorb words from an indigenous culture, we can even have multiple names for the same exact item or action.

So I propose the following : Let's rename "Canadian Bacon" to "Little Hams"

Never again will Alice the waitress ask you, "Bacon or Canadian Bacon?"
Instead, once our campaign achieves success, Alice will ask, "Bacon, or some little hams?"
You will proudly reply, "Bacon."

Canadian Bacon is actually "back bacon" but who the hell (in this country) would want to know where their food actually comes from?

It shall begin here, on Blasphemes - and sweep across the world.
Little Hams will now be selected as a drunk pizza topping, served for hearty breakfasts, and really lame dinners. Never again will the non-descript "Canadian" word be lazily tacked on to describe a non-bacon product. Now our better, more accurate word will describe what the product is, and how it will taste. A little ham. No surprises, because that's exactly what it is.

Nice. Little. Ham.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great idea. I'm calling it Little Hams from now on.

Spread the word

Anonymous said...

I fuckin hate Canada bacon.