Iran... Iran so far away...

Al-Qaeda has accused Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad of spreading "conspiracy theories" about the 9/11 attacks in 2001. 

Inspire, an al-Qaeda-linked online magazine, described Mr Ahmadinejad's controversial speech to the United Nations last week as "ridiculous". The Iranian leader said he believed the World Trade Center towers could not have been brought down by aircraft.

The article said such a belief "stands in the face of all logic and evidence". Entitled "Iran and the Conspiracy Theories", the Inspire article said Iran used the theory "as a rallying call for the millions of Muslims around the world who despise America". Iran "is a collaborator with the US when it suits it" nonetheless, the Yemen-based author said.

 There have been sharp sectarian tensions between mainly Shia Iran and Sunni Muslim al-Qaeda - although are both fiercely opposed to US influence. Yeah, they're jealous. This is only slightly less hillarious because, yeah, you guessed it -- The Onion already did it.
9/11 Conspiracy Theories 'Ridiculous,' Al Qaeda Says

And speaking of funny... and I guess this really should be titled "Iran not-so Far Away" : Iran’s Navy says it will establish a presence near US borders “the same way that the world arrogant power” has a presence near Iran.

Now, before you fall on the floor laughing at this absurd comment... MockMood and Chavez are good pals. And who says we're not teeing up for a Venezuela-styled Cuban Missile Crisis? Hey gang! Let's get ready for 6 shooting wars!

Weeping Santa Jesus

I just found this:
“Remembering” by Fran Lagana-Brooks. From the “Weeping Santa” collection.

All I can think of when I see Super giant Jesus comforts weeping Santa, damn it - we haven't even had Halloween yet, people! Also, notice Jesus didn't leave any foot prints - walks on water, whether frozen or liquid.

Terror Threat 'Most Heightened' Since 9/11

So says Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano.

"The terrorist threat facing our country has evolved significantly in the last ten years -- and continues to evolve -- so that, in some ways, the threat facing us is at its most heightened state since those attacks, she said before the House Homeland Security Committee.

"Homeland Security Officials Call Homegrown Radicalism a Game Changer." Yeah, she's been pushing that one a lot lately. I'm never sure if she's just taking about people who disagree with her, or people who are of a different skin color than her? If you're either one, or both - don't piss off the Secretary.

Read more ....

And wait, I thought America was totally blindsided on September 11, and then was outraged and completely and totally over-reacted (ask Japan the Sioux how that worked out) to the terrorist attacks. Does she mean since after September 11th? So, shouldn't she just say since 9/12? Or am I reading too much between the lines - again?

On the bright side - Suspects identified in the Russian airport bombing.

Sunday Comics: Week in Review

We made it. Finish line. The end of the week. The power is still on, and the Zombie Apocalypse is on AMC and not on my street -- that's a half truth, as it's Halloween. We can still ward off the zombies and Batmen, and the Princess Fairy Ballerinas with small packets of High Fructose Corn Syrup rather than Remington lead.
Meantime, on the Mall of America - the one in DC, not Minnesota, two comedian political commentators are holding a rally. Jon Stewart's Speech Today

Full text HTML -

Best reaction from YouTube comments:

"This is the kind of speech you want to see quoted in future history books.

And these beautiful words were not given by a world leader, president, or congressman. They were given by a stand-up comedian who has a comedy show on TV.

We are at a strange time in the kingdom, when the wisest, sanest, most rational voice of them all is that of the court jester."

Meantime - here's your digital button to display on 4 square, facebook, or what have - you.

Meantime Linus sits in his pumpkin patch waiting for real reason to rise out of there and give him presents. Or is The Great Pumpkin supposed to be a deity? Either way, rational Linus gets duped every year. And they call Charlie Brown a loser. Maybe Peanuts are deeper than we give them credit?
Still doesn't change the fact the Democrats are in for a bloodbath on Tuesday.
But, hilariously, it's not the Democrats who are going to lose - it's ALL of US! I particularly like this cartoon, and I would even say it's one of my favorites of the year.Finally, this was found on a wall.
Thank good peer reviewed science we made it. Hope to see you at the end of next week.

PS - Back in the day, the Halloween Hours were posted. It was After Dinner (5:30 to 7:30) Before Bed.
Now, I've heard of people taking the kiddies out as early as 2:00 PM? WTF? Come on! I'm not answering the door at 2 PM unless you have a warrant. And, look, teenagers, you can come and have my small packet of M&M's - that's fine. Respect the light on - I'm playing, Light off - I'm not. We cool?

But you know what pisses me off the most? It's parents Trick-or-Treating with babies. Not that I don't want to see your little angel dressed up as the Bride of Frankenstein -- it's that you're asking me to give you candy... for the baby? Seriously?

No. Because you, the parent are going to eat it, or much worse, you'll give it to that child.

Did You Know...

Probe Links European Plot To 9/11

A Suspect From Germany Killed in a Drone Strike Last Week Had Contacts With Terrorists Tied to the Sept. 11 Attacks.

A terrorist suspect from Germany killed last week by a U.S. drone missile in Pakistan was in contact with 9/11 collaborators just days before the 2001 attacks, according to court records.

Ramzi Binalshibh, who allegedly helped to coordinate and finance the 9/11 attacks, placed a 34-second phone call on Sept. 5, 2001, to the home of Naamen Meziche, who Pakistani officials say was one of eight people killed by the drone.

Read more ....

1/2 Cent: Our laws prohibit law enforcement to arrest known Al Qaeda sympathizers and supporters .... until they show up at an Al Qaeda training camp in the mountains of Pakistan, where they then fall under the responsibility of the CIA and/or U.S. military. Good riddance. Rather there than in Times Square. However, what else did this guy know?

Remember

For all of our problems, and our animosities toward each other in the USA, it should be remembered that we can organize and create amazing things, when motivated. We can build steel towers that defy wind and gravity by having the load bearing walls that stretch higher than any other tower on the planet. Two of them. And combined, contain more office space than all of downtown Miami in a two block radius on a small island in New York harbor. We, as Americans, can and have built massive structures such as the Hoover Dam, and interlocking Interstate Highway System and even put twelve men on the moon and brought them back. Those are examples of our government projects that work. Together, Americans can accomplish the impossible, or even the improbable. When they come together for common good, for our society, for our goofy consumer based, wasteful, capitalist lifestyle - Americans have done some amazing things.

There are others on the globe that hate us - some in other Western countries, and others in places that can only dream of our wealth, prosperity and waistlines. Whether it's because we flaunt it, are rude on vacation, or have carried out wars and assassinations to make sure we carry on. America has a bi-polar disease. We flaunt liberty and human rights while we have the largest prison population per capita than anyone else in the world. We expect human rights to not be ignored, but barely care when we hear our cheep toasters come from children working in deplorable conditions. And sure, the eight trips to Target in a week in the Lincoln MKX to pick up plastic bins that are on sale is silly and unsustainable. And we've done a lot of 'interesting' moves along the way to ensure the liberty of a lot of jack-asses. But that's our deal. We've done things to keep our silly lifestyle unmolested from foreign forces who would make us change our ways. But when you threaten us, we'll over react. Just ask Japan.

There are volumes of books about 9/11. How it happened, did it happen, who really did it... I'm not a conspiracy theory kind of guy. It was there, it was a symbol, and the bad guys wanted to send a message to America to cut it out. Twice. Once in February 26, the other on September 11th. They proved that they don't understand us, about as well as we don't understand them. Rather than getting into a geo-political discussion of the events leading up to and after 9/11... let's just remember that day. Remember everyone who died, and what you were doing, and how you felt when you saw the towers fall, and the walls of the Pentagon breached, and the smoldering crater in Pennsylvania.

I will. And when I see an airplane flying, I remember when I didn't see airplanes flying. As flawed as we are, I know I hit the lucky sperm club lottery to be who I am, where I am, when I am. I'm proud to be an American.

Weiner In Your Face

Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY) lashes out at Republicans (namely Rep. Peter King) who voted against a bill that would have secured $7.4 billion dollars for the medical expenses of 9/11 emergency responders who became ill in the line of duty.

It's inspiring to see such passion - even if it was just yelling and screaming - presented in the Congress. Whether or not I personally agree with his decision I truly respect his stance and finally showed some balls. Most politicians are so concerned about their political career and walking on eggshells and partisan.

He could probably aspire to a higher office seeing as how viral this video has gotten today - too bad about that name though.

Hero's

This is about 3 miles from the Flight 93 Crash site. I don't know what to say, except they spelled "Heroes" wrong. Twice.

2 cuils regarding relevancy between flight 93 and abortion. Maybe it's just an ad for a sandwich shop?

And if Jesus was RIGHT THERE, how come he didn't just catch the bloody plane?!

Never Forget

Never forget... when Cookie Monster got super huge and ate the World Trade Center in 1976...

How to Explain 9-11 To Kids

Take out the blocks, arrange them in a lower Manhattan skyline, then get a couple die cast airplanes - then fling them at the towers as hard as you can.

But if you're a truther, it's a little harder. Set the whole thing up months ahead of time - somehow don't tell ANYONE about it. Then place Black Cat firecrackers inside all of the blocks. Then place them in one of the buildings next to it as well. Be sure that you pay everyone off to keep them quiet, or kill them off ahead of time.

Then, orchestrate a false flag die cast plane hostage crisis - four planes, maybe more. Ditch the planes and the passengers somehow then hit the Pentagon with a missile or a Matchbox truck bomb, again, don't tell anyone...

...do I need to continue this nonsense? Can't we just all agree that our government was asleep at the wheel while some religious fundamentalists who were pissed off at the United States for meddling with world affairs fought back in a spectacular Jerry Bruckheimer inspired terror display? Then the terrorists who expected the paper lion to fold were caught with their pants down as the U.S. fought back by overreacting to the point of tearing up the Constitution and depleting the treasury.

goddamn it.

Van Jones Gone

White House "green jobs" adviser Van Jones resigned in the middle of the Labor Day weekend following persistent controversy over his past remarks and associations.

Jones, who served as an adviser to the White House Council on Environmental Quality, which has got to be the most made-up job in the Obama Administration so far, had generated mounting criticism over the past week. He had issued back-to-back apologies -- first, for calling Republicans "assholes" during a videotaped address earlier in the year, and second for signing a petition in 2004 supporting the "9/11 truther" movement, which believes the Bush administration may have been involved in the Sept. 11, 2001, terror attacks.

The latter development, which came on top of several others, was perhaps the most devastating and led to calls for his resignation. The left has truthers, the right has birthers. You just can't be a vocal truther when you work for the government. That's a feedback loop.

Jones stepped down late Saturday.

Jones, I guess, has been part of and in the middle of this Glen Beck back and forth fighting, and whatnot - and I don't care one bit about it. They're both whining idiots who have zero talent except for using their tongues to get phoney-balonie jobs. Yeah, I said that. But what I do care about is that if some government appointee is going to let his lips flap around outloud without any political regard, and when there's a microphone involved (Jebus, people!) there should be appropriate countermeasures. There are. And he's gone. Well, bye. (Beck is just about out of advertisers too, btw.)

What will be interesting to see is how it will be spun into a positive - you know, 'his resignation will deflect distractions from the Health Care Debate, or from scorn on the Obama Administration. what a hero' - or if the whole affair will just be broomed under the rug because it is Labor Day Weekend? Stay tuned.

What? Too Soon?

The World Wildlife Fund is joining a growing chorus of voices expressing outrage over an ad bearing its symbol that shows dozens of planes bearing down on lower Manhattan with a tag line that reads, "The Tsunami Killed 100 Times More People Than 9/11."

The ad was leaked in the week prior to the anniversary of the attacks of Sept 11, with copy that states, "The planet is brutally powerful. Respect it. Preserve it."

The WWF says it never approved the ad, issuing a press release to assure critics that it rejected the ad proposal, which was done by Brazilian design firm DDB Brasil.

“WWF strongly condemns this offensive and tasteless ad and did not authorize its production or publication," said a statement issued by the World Wildlife Fund on Tuesday.

"The concept was summarily rejected by WWF and should never have seen the light of day. It is an unauthorized use of our logo and we are aggressively pursuing action to have it removed from Web sites where it is being currently featured," the statement said.

The ad had been pitched to the Brazilian branch of the WWF by the advertising agency and was rejected, spokesman for the group Steve Ertel told The New York Times

Former Bradley Student from Peoria IL Al Qaeda Agent pleads GUILTY in Aiding Sept. 11 Attackers

A former Bradley University student pleaded guilty in Peoria federal court today to conspiring with, and providing support for, Al Qaeda operatives in the months before and after the terrorist attacks on Sept. 11, 2001.

Ali al-Marri, 43, (seen in this picture in his super secret spy outfit that allowed him to just blend right in Midwestern town of Peoria IL - I mean look at that Mullet!) spoke softly and occasionally smiled as U.S. District Judge Michael Mihm read aloud a timeline of criminal activity that included meetings with two key architects of the terrorist attacks, participating in terrorist training camps in Pakistan and researching cyanide compounds and other chemical agents purportedly for an attack on U.S soil.

"Ali al-Marri today admitted that he came here, to Peoria, Illinois, as an Al Qaeda operative the day before the Sept. 11 attacks to plan and prepare for future acts of terrorism within the United States," said Jeffrey Lang, acting U.S. Attorney for the central district of Illinois.

Appearing in khaki pants, a plain white shirt and white kufi hat, the bearded al-Marri admitted to having associations with both Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the alleged mastermind of the Sept. 11 attacks, and Mustafa al-Hawsawi, chief financier of the attacks, prior to arriving in the U.S. on Sept. 10, 2001 after obtaining a student visa from Bradley University.

While training at several terrorist camps in Pakistan, al-Marri admitted he became an expert with military weapons, learned to conceal his identity online and used his computer to research chemical agents that could be used in an attack.

U.S. attorneys culled from al-Marri's laptop computer research on various cyanide compounds, their toxicity levels and where they could be bought.

Al-Marri also admitted to exploring uses from sulfuric acid. And while it's not certain whether al-Marri planned to use these chemicals, U.S. agents also recovered from his house an almanac with pages book-marked showing U.S. bridges, roads and waterways.

A native of Qatar and a father of five, al-Marri was living in Peoria on a student visa when he was arrested.

He was initially charged in federal court and then suddenly shifted over to military custody and then held for years without charges.

Al-Marri is being held at the Federal Correctional Institution in Pekin, Ill. His attorneys are seeking to have him serve his imprisonment in his native Qatar.

Tribune staff reporters Josh Meyer and David G. Savage contributed to this report from Washington.

Al-Marri is being held at the Federal Correctional Institution in Pekin, Ill. His attorneys are seeking to have him serve his imprisonment in his native Qatar.

- No doubt this story isn't even started. Again, the Obama Administration walks the tightrope of getting Al-Marri out of military custody - but will try him in the civilian courts. Obviously the political and National Security issues conflict here.

Why Al-Marri isn't being hung NOW - and I mean RIGHT NOW for admission of treason and for crimes against humanity are unclear.