Pizza the Hutt

With a significant decline in sales, Pizza Hut has decided that its branding is what is keeping people away from their terrible slimy pizza. Obviously the newly branded ‘The Hut’ will make you eat their food again. Right?

More folks are eating at home and starting to avoid 'junk' food to save money and their health. The largest player in the pizza junk food is trying to win back pizza fans with a new image and menu items like all-natural multigrain pizza, lasagna, and wings. But they're doing it by re-branding rather than... lasagna? Who in their right mind is buying lasagna from Pizza Hut?

There's a big trend in general around having confidence in the foods that you eat. People over the age of 35, whose frequency with pizza is declining, said one of the big things that would reignite their passion with the category is to have a pizza made with multigrain crust and an all natural tomato sauce...

Design is a great way to create an emotional expression for your brand. But the pizza category has been a real laggard in doing that. Our red box is a game changer in packaging and design. And yes, we're also introducing another vocabulary word with Pizza Hut, which is 'The Hut.' That ties in nicely with (today's) texting generation. We wanted to make sure that Pizza Hut and 'The Hut' become common vernacular for our brand. Red is our mark and when you see that red roof, people will refer to it as 'The Hut' or 'Pizza Hut.' As we expand our online and mobile businesses, 'The Hut' is the perfect icon for our mobile generation.

- Brian Niccol, Pizza Hut CMO on BrandWeek

What I'm reading here - and feel free to correct me - is that some marketing guru told Pizza Hut executives that Hut is easier to type on Twitter or Facebook. And that's why Pizza Hut has been losing customers and market share? Yeah, that's how I read it.

While 'The Hut' branded pizza boxes are already in use and several restaurants have already been converted, it has not been decided whether Pizza Hut will be rebranding all of its restaurants.

We think that 'The Hut' is to Pizza Hut as Coke is to Coca-Cola. We have begun using the term in conjunction with Pizza Hut in our advertising, pizza boxes and some restaurants.

- Christopher Fuller, Pizza Hut spokesman on WalletPop

Nice box. Full of red dyes and probably can't be recycled. Yeah, that's a good way to attract new 'green' customers. I guess there aren't a whole lot of ClimateFaithers eating Pizza Hut anyway?

The newly converted 'The Hut' restaurants have been seen popping up across the United States, including this one spotted in Florida:

They've included the old 'red roof' in their graphic. It's a hold over from the last rebranding effort - and it represnts the iconic buildings from two generations ago. How does that make sense? If they're so intent on attracting the new texting demographic, why would your logo represent a building that no longer exists, and hasn't since those kids were born?

Pizza Hut spokesman Chris Fuller has said that 'The Hut' is just a marketing effort and not a permanent name change. MSN reports: "The boxes and some store signs will say 'The Hut.' Others will retain the Pizza Hut name." In related news, Pizza Hut is launching Hut TV, an in-store video network which will allow customers to watch TV show... yeah, that will get me back into their store.

Try cleaning the place and turning OFF the TV... oh, and work on the pizza, not the branding. That might help.

Or - go the opposite direction. If you're trying to get the over 35 crowd: Go all-out Retro. Build red roofed buildings again. Don't install air conditioning. Only hire one waiter/waitress. Put Atari cocktail games as half the tables, pitchers of watered down Pepsi in sticky booths on even stickier checkerboard table cloths. Sponsor some little league teams and women's volleyball, and make them eat at the restaurant on off nights.

Told ya...

Sometimes, you just don't need those fancy polls and whatnot. You just need the Capn.

Here's the latest "news" to be found on Yahoo:
Democrat Hillary Clinton would lose to all major Republican White House candidates, according to a hypothetical election matchup poll Monday, reversing her months of dominance over potential 2008 challengers.

The Zogby International poll was the latest sign that withering attacks on the former first lady were chipping away at her opinion poll leads just 38 days before the Iowa caucuses, the first party nominating contests.

In the new survey, Clinton trailed Senator John McCain 42 percent to 38 percent, former New York mayor Rudolph Giuliani by 43 percent to 40 percent and former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney by 43 percent to 40 percent.

She also lagged behind former Arkansas Republican governor Mike Huckabee by 44 to 39 percent, and former Senator Fred Thompson by 44 to 40 percent in hypothetical general election matchups.

Clinton's top Democratic challengers Barack Obama and John Edwards however would still beat their hypothetical Republican rivals in potential 2008 contests.

This validates my point about Rove, it validates my thoughts on this stuff since I joined up here on this here Blasphemes deal. I have said that ANY of the Republican fellows could beat her in the national race. I don't know when, search for it. I ask now, how is this crap news? The country voted for BUSH over Longfellow -er- Kerry. The country hasn't come together to teach the world to sing the Coca-Cola song. Why would anyone think that Hillary can or would? She represents everything that is wrong with the Democratic party right now, and until now - right now - the minute you're reading this - has anyone bothered to think that through.

I have been waiting for Al Gore to take the stage. It's his time, and he's due the trumping of the Clintons (both of them) who threw him under the bus in 2000. I even support him to take the DNC nomination. Mostly for the humor factor.

Now it's up to Obama and also Edwards to get off their hands and go for the jugular. Don't hold back for the VeeP spot - you don't want that anyway... especially if you're going to loose with Hillary on top.... ewww... going to have to go back and edit that last sentence...

If you disagree - go on, start a flamewar with me. I'm working slow as I'm still recovering from that damned flu bug. Remember, you gots to show your work.

Manuel Uribe

Manuel Uribe, tipping the scales at 560 kilograms (1,234 pounds) and seen here at his home in 2006, will be listed as the world's fattest man by the Guinness Book of Records, while a loss of 200 kilos (440 pounds) may make him the man who lost the most weight.(AFP/Alejandro Acosta)