Brownback out! Uh, who?

That would be Republican Sen. Sam Brownback, the Kansas conservative who struggled to raise money and gain recognition in the 2008 presidential campaign.
There's just GOT to be a Larry Craig joke there...

Who was Brownback, and why wasn't he popular? He's a proponent of American theocracy. Doesn't believe in evolution, is probably a psychopath too. You know, I'm not really sure - and it looks like it doesn't matter any more...

So who's left? Let's start with the Coke Side:

Rudy Guliani: 9/11 9/11 9/11!

John McCain: Very very old.

Fred Thompson: Hot wife. Was on that one TV show.

Ron Paul: Most popular on the interwebs; crazies.

Mitt Romney: The secret underwear candidate, in favor of expanding Camp Gitmo, not a fan of Larry Craig, likes war - but his own children are doing more for the country by helping him campaign than they would going to fight in the war.

Mike Huckabeee: Uh, who?

Now the Pepsi Side:

Hillary Clinton: Likely to allow Republicans to pick up senate and congressional seats if nominated for the primary. Scares the hell out of half the country.

Barrack Obama: Not the most politically experienced, somehow manages not to stand out in a group of robotic candidates incapable of standing out.

John Edwards: Lets his wife fight all his battles, is incapable of doing or saying anything newsworthy except his hair.

Dennis Kucinich: Hot wife. Goofy hippie.

Now your RC Cola choice:

Stephen Colbert: Is a liberal playing a conservative on a fake TV news show. He's the perfect American candidate.

Me? I'll have tap water, please.