He's half Joe Camel and a third Fonzarelli!

On the left is Clark, the Chicago Cubs new mascot. On the right is Poochie, a Simpsons character from 17 years ago created to parody cartoons trying too hard to be cool.

Which old suit at the Cubs senior staff, desperately needing to justify their job, pulled rank on the creative team, taking a mascot that might have otherwise been fine -- into this walking abortion.

The dated bent backwards hat is a dead give away.

They're almost making it embarrassing to be a Cubs fan. Let that marinate for a while.

But hey, as with everything in life, it could have been worse...