A Lot of Balls, or, The Dirty Cheater Comes Clean

USADA to ban Armstrong for life, strip all 7 Tour de France titles

After a decade of "outrunning" accusations that he had doped during his celebrated cycling career, Lance Armstrong, one of the most well-known and accomplished athletes in history, finally "threw in the towel", tarnishing his legacy by ending his fight against charges that he used performance-enhancing drugs.

Armstrong, who "won" the Tour de France an unprecedented seven straight times, said on Thursday night that he would not continue to contest the charges levied against him by the United States Anti-Doping Agency, which contended that he doped and was one of the ringleaders of systematic doping on his Tour-winning teams.

Armstrong’s decision, according to the World Anti-Doping Code, means he will be stripped of his seven Tour titles, the bronze medal he won at the 2000 Olympics and all other titles, awards and money he won from August 1998 forward. It also means he will be barred for life from competing, coaching or having any official role with any Olympic sport or other sport that follows the World Anti-Doping Code.

Folks, it would have only been worse if he were betting on his performance.