Wal-Mart is selling Ultra Douche.A silly mistake on their web site, or best truth in advertising ever? Perhaps the best Halloween costume ever offered?
Yes I agree that this young man is an Douche. But what constitutes "Ultra Douche"?
He has a vintage looking baseball cap on. His hat is on facing forward, not backward. Note that he's wearing a cap. Not a visor. Suggested visor isn't upside down, backwards, and turned inside out... which would suggest 'Ultra' to me.
Camo shorts with little, I don't know - string? Sock holders? What's that sh*t hanging from his pants? Yes, Douche-y. But it's not torn... still wondering about the 'Ultra' here.
Does he have a cruddy Abercrombie-American Eagle-Urban Outfitters polo shirt? Flip flops? And how about a smug, self-satisfied, entitled attitude? You betcha to all those checkpoints. He even looks a little like Jerry O'Connel - the fat kid from Stand By Me who grew up to bang Rebecca Romijn-Stamos.
No, the thing I think we're missing here is a scalped ticket stub to the Wrigley Field bleacher section in his pocket. Then I think this guy would be an 'Ultra Douche.'
If you notice, he's not even wearing a hat depicting a sports team. Just one of those lame/awful/terrible/douchy/faggy looking hats that sissy/emo kids wear. If you're going to wear a hat, it needs to be a sports related hat. Otherwise your Man Card should be revoked and your balls chopped off.
ReplyDeleteThis "guy" has no man card, Duke.
ReplyDeleteThe question is - is he an ULTRA?
Maybe he needs an Obama button to get him over the edge>?
at Duke:
ReplyDeleteBecause we all know that it is super-manly to be such a geek as to find an identity in the accomplishments of others, and be such a math nerd that you constantly memorise and spout statistics.
Just saying.
All in good fun.
Wouldn't a math nerd be busy with equations and calculus and proving theorems?? Enjoying sports has nothing to do with being a math nerd, in fact it's the exact opposite. Knowing a lot about sports can pay off in the forms of bets, winning pools, etc. Wearing an awful hat gets you...nothing.
ReplyDeleteand would the bets and pools be based on....hmm..analysing "Stats?"
ReplyDeleteCall it what you want. If you know rebound recovery records, ERA's, or passing yardage, You are using MATH.
Yes, it is Organised sports dirty little secret.
The difference between the lads at a Sports Bar arguing over the greatest Pitcher ever & the blokes playing D & D with graph paper?
A jersey.
Now, throwing a ball around, that has nothing to do with math. Just physics.
Shut up Cthulu. Dork
ReplyDelete