Big Caucus Night

For the better part of three months, I have been hibernating for reasons I would rather not be public. Suffice to say, I had some readers of this blog that I was . . that could . . um. I had a chaperon at the after-prom party. A chaperon that does not approve or at the least will misinterpret (or worse, understand) some of the opinions that I have. But I can stay quiet no more for today is the first day of the political season. The Iowa caucus. The time to find out who will prevail and whom will wail. Sorry 'bout that, Mr. Dean.

Tonight Iowans will sit around in barns, kitchens and schoolhouse gymnasiums and decide who will get talked about most over the weekend when Americans rub the gunk out of their eyes and realize we are about to have an election. It is harder and harder for average Americans to decipher when the election cycle comes around. Part of this is due to the non-stop 24-7 dirty, evil, greed-driven, manipulative politicians that in our system and partially due to the schooling system that they have helped create.

In a tragically flawed method of holding a primary, the caucus allows voters to raise their hands to show support of their candidate and then change their minds if their candidate receives less than 15% of the vote. This is not the case for Republicans who opt for a more honest system of secret ballots and counting them however they feel like. The bottom line is this is the vote for talk. The winners will be talked about for the next five days and then Iowans will once again slip into the irrelevant and we will move on the the great state of New Hampshire until 2012 when we will do it all again.

My predictions for tonight are as follows:

Dems: Edwards, Obama, Clinton
Reps: McCain, Romney, Guliani

There is an old joke that I wanted to work into this but couldn't. What is worse than a cold toilet seat? A warm toilet seat.