fiction by killre
From a column written by David Ulysses Houghton and printed in the Brownsville Sentinel on June 6th. All reproduced text is sic.
As I told you they would last week the Brownsville Bears Base Ball Club finished up there long stretch a home games aggenst the first place Kessingtons be for levin town to go an play a set in Beardsley. The club that is nippin at Kessingtons heals as it were. Kessingtons pitchin an cetchin well lets just say they cant darn sox with out a hole hand full a thimbels but they were shore ta bring plenty a hittin to the ball grounds. So I hope as many a you base ball fanaticks as could get there got there.
For yous that diddint heres what happend.
Well Kessington come in ta toun a might short for starters. Ha thats a pun I wuzzunt even triin ta make. One a the men missin from the mornin train wuz Jupiter Black you see. That tall lanky fella who looks like he could throwe hard but in sted tosses a nuckel ball up there about haff the time. A nuther wuz his pitchin coach Silas Uebel. That hill wizard that chucked the pill as they say for Gerryowen for so long his dennist won first prize at the county fare an ole Si made an ever luvvin livvin out a gettin evry boddy ta evry time ground out ta short stop seems like.
Moest notabul for his absense though wuz Manager Dell Schmittinger.
Pete Zborezny the Kessingtons hittin coach must be dooin sumpn rite cuz they are wompin the Devil rite out a the ball. But one thing he wuzzent dooin when they come in wuz anserrin qwestchuns cuz he an they were all as tite lipt as a preacher thats ben caut doun a long Farmington Road late at nite an short on cabbage. I tride like a judge ta get the story out a them but nun a them were talkin. The three shode up for the first game though an all Uebel would say in three days a askin wuz they had bizness to attend to.
As for the games them selvs.
Stump started for the Bears aggenst Eckhardt for Kessington. Stump did well in his first innin aggenst Kessington this year. He only aloud three runs. His seckind innin wuz his last as the vizzitters scored six more an went on to win 13-4. Kessingtons big first base man Ray Kieley homerd twice. Roger Hilyard wuz the Bears hittin star. Doubeling in two in the sevvunth.
Game two featcherd Mummert aggenst Pfeifle. Mummert did better than Stump. Allowing for runs in the third but nothin more in sevvun innins a work. The Bears ralleed for three runs in the nineth but came up short 4-3. This time it was third base man Howard Tennie who drove in two for the Bears.
Brownsville finely broke through in game three which pitted Lowry aggenst Black. Lowry shut them doun for ate innins while the Bears scored two in the fifth on the only hit Black aloud. It wuz Hilyards. Black walkt six batters in nine innins an there wuz an error by Kieley that aloud the Bears to score a nuther run in the sevvunth. Kieley came back though an hit a three run homer to tie up the game in the nineth. Edward Facey releved Lowry. Moran would pitch for Kessington after Black wuz puled for a pinch hitter in the tenth. John Tomlin delivverd the winnin hit in the 11th as Brownsville won 4-3.
When the Bears a rived in Beardsley they
Records show Brownsville split its first two games with Beardsley, who had themselves split their previous six. As of the morning this column was published, Kessington had a lead of 1/2 game over Beardsley and 2 games over Gerryowen.