Jul 23, 2010

NY Democrats Are Doing It Wrong

Remember how, back in 2008, everyone voted out the Republicans because they were greedy, corrupt, and disrespectful of the voting public? Well give them this much: But they were so GOOD at it!

If you want to see politicians who are simultaneously a) corrupt and b) really bad at it, look no farther than New York state, where elected Democrats are tarnishing every institution of disciplined corruption that the Gambino family worked for decades to establish.

To illustrate our point, here’s a list of all the corrupt Democrats that New York has had to endure in recent months… plus the corrupt Republicans they could learn from.

Corrupt Democrat
Act of Corruption
Republican Who Did It Better
Eliot Spitzer, ex-governor
Hard to believe this was 2 years ago. Spitzer rode a wave of self-righteousness all the way to Washington, DC, where he washed up aboard The Mayflower… and then paid several thousand dollars for rough sex. David Vitter, who one-ups Spitzer’s hypocrisy by trying to criminalize the very prostitution industry he patronized so faithfully.
David Paterson, current governor
Allegedly used state police to intimidate the victim of his wife-beating aide. And he forced the Yankees to give him free World Series tickets. Rudy Giuliani knows more about exploiting the Yankees. He also knows how to get way more out of thuggish police officers.
Hiram Monserrate, ex-State Senator

Beat the crap out of his live-in girlfriend. Ousted Rep. Don Sherwood (R-PA) beat the crap out of his live-in mistress.

Charlie Rangel, U.S. Representative

Despite chairing the tax-writing House Ways and Means Committee, he appears to not have declared a taxable asset since the Carter administration. Ex-Rep. Randy “Duke” Cunningham, who’s paying back taxes on lobbying gifts in the form of hand-made license plates.

Eric Massa, U.S. Representative

Propositioned a male aide in his Capitol Hill offices. Actually, Massa even beats the Republicans in this category. Not even Mark Foley was slick enough to use the excuse: “I’m just a salty old sailor.

Frankly, maybe the NY Democrats should caucus with Illinois or Louisiana Democrats to learn up on how to do it RIGHT.

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