Unfortunately, C.K., as much as that font looks just like the USA Today, this appears to have been created to make it look funny, and/or to support a political agenda.
In my search to verify the pulled-out-of-someone's-ass-statistics, I came across the following article at Snopes.com. Unfortunately for the gag writer, it seems that it's false.
But, as promised - I post everything I get. Thanks for the mail, C.K.!